Crosswords, the Ultimate Aphrodisiac | McHumor & TheKomic Cartoons

I just listed this item on eBay: one used copy of The New York Times Ferocious Crosswords: 150 Hard Puzzles edited by Will Shortz where I’ve already done 100 of the puzzles. Starting bid: $15

Here’s why this copy is worth at least $5.05 more than it sold for new in 2009.

You see an intriguing man or woman in the airport or on the subway, a man or woman you want to get to know better, a man or woman you want to impress. How do you go about it? Walk up and say, “I graduated summa cum laude from Harvard and Apple made me a seven-figure offer for my app.”

No. That would be pretentious, especially if you didn’t graduate from Harvard, have to look up the proper spelling of summa cum laude, and the only offer Apple has made to you is a discount on your next iTune purchase. No, what you need to do is sit next to this individual and pull out your book of puzzles, and not just any puzzles, but Ferocious New York Time Crosswords.

You pull out a pen and slowly flip through the book past pages and pages of finished puzzles all done in ink. People are always in awe of those doing crosswords in ink.

I did the crosswords in ink not because I’m confident of my answers, but because pencils smear. Very often my answers were wrong and I scrawled over them. This makes the book even more valuable than one with 100 perfectly filled-in puzzles. Someone who never made a mistake would be intimidating. There’s no greater aphrodisiac than someone who’s not afraid to let others see that he or she can make a mistake.

I’m including with this book at absolutely no extra charge an empty pen. You can shake it and draw circles on a page, but nothing will come out. This gives you the perfect opening line, “Do you happen to have a pen?”